My Beautiful Mess

So by Wednesday evening, Dad and my step-mom had talked with the GI doc who was planning on doing an endoscopy the next day to try to unblock a bile duct. This blockage was what was causing the jaundice and the weight loss. No bile to your stomach means no “juice” to digest your food properly and so then the bile goes into your system, turning you yellow (just fyi, jaundice in newborns is totally different). And, yes, there was discussion as to “what” might be blocking this duct, but of course we all remained hopeful that it would be a quick and easy procedure.

The next day was my youngest son’s birthday, and a work-day for me. But Dad was constantly on my mind. If I am remembering right, the procedure was to be done at 1:00 pm so I was expecting to hear from my step-mom shortly after 2:00 pm. When 5:00 pm began to approach and my little family was preparing to go celebrate birthday, I called my step-mom.

Hey, it’s Jenn, I say. Amidst tears is the reply, I know.

The GI doc had run into a hard mass and couldn’t even get to the bile duct. He said that 9 times out of 10, this was pancreatic cancer.

The next step was to talk to a surgeon. One thing I still don’t get is that they were going to have to totally open Dad up to get a complete picture of what was going on - was it cancer, had it spread, what organs were involved - we would know none of that until they opened him up.  The best surgeon to do the procedure (a whipple) would do surgery on November 5th. So on Halloween, they sent him home. I told Dad that the jaundice at least made for a good Halloween costume!!

You have to laugh - or you’ll just end up in sobbing heap on the floor.