Month: August 2019

Motherhood, Wellness

8 Signs You Have Mom Burnout

by Mary Lentz2 Comments on 8 Signs You Have Mom Burnout

Momming is hard! You may be wondering if you’re just tired or it’s something more serious. Here are 8 signs you have mom burnout.

If you read this blog often, you’ll know I write often about how hard motherhood is and dedicate a lot of my posts to motherhood support. I think it’s really important to understand what moms go through, but most of all to know there is help. Mom burnout is a real thing and you may not even realize that it’s happening. Today, I’m sharing 8 signs that you have mom burnout.

8 Signs You Have Mom Burnout

You’re Exhausted All the Time

You’re exhausted as soon as your feet hit the floor and you drag all throughout the day. Girl, I’ve been there. All-day tiredness is a big sign that you are running on fumes. If even a good night sleep can’t quench your exhaustion, there is a bigger problem afoot. Even a deep sleep can’t solve the mental and emotional exhaustion you might be feeling. Or perhaps you aren’t sleeping at all despite being totally exhausted! I’ve found there are two things to help with that. Relaxation (decompressing) and joyful activities.

Relaxation requires you to be awake. It can sometimes mean stillness, quietness, or engaging in an activities that makes you feel relaxed, centered, and calm. For some ideas, look at my post 30 Day Wellness Challenge.

When it comes to joyful activities, this means doing things that bring you joy. Maybe it’s playing sports or doing crafts. Exhaustion can happen when the rigors of life are out of balance with the joy in our lives. Don’t forget that having fun is a great way to replenish yourself.

You Can’t Focus

A lack of focus can show up in all kinds of ways. You may notice you are struggling to remember things. You may notice it’s more than just fogginess. Perhaps, you’re making serious mistakes and oversights – things that are completely out of character for you to overlook. I have a great attention to detail, so when I start making sloppy mistakes I know it’s time to slow down and regroup. When you’re exhausted and burnt out, you’ll struggle to keep it all together.

Everything Sets You Off

For me, the main sign I am burnt out is very obvious. I get irritable! I’m being generous here. I become nothing short of a fire-breathing, snarling, little she-demon when I’ve hit my limit. Everything upsets me. Patience is short. Mercy is little. I hate admitting that, but chances are if you’re around me for any length of time, I can’t keep that a secret. Maybe other people aren’t as extreme as I am, but I bet most people are fairly irritable when they are burnt out. I’ve seen it before in co-workers and family. When we’ve had enough, we get pretty fed up with everything. If you find yourself irritable and frustrated all the time or over small matters, you may need to ask yourself if it’s time for a break.

You Become Negative

Okay y’all. I’m no Tony Robbins or Rachel Hollis. I’m not naturally happy-go-lucky or super positive. I try to be, but it certainly does not come naturally. Becoming negative though is actually one of the first signs I have mom burnout. Being negative doesn’t just mean being a “Debby Downer.” It also means you start feeling jaded, maybe even a little cynical about your life, people and circumstances.

The problem is that when we feed a negative attitude, we being to feel even worse. This is why we are instructed by the Bible, motivational speakers, and life coaches to remain purposely positive during hard times. Actions follow our thoughts. Negative thoughts snowball and we can start lashing out in all kinds of destructive ways. A consistent pattern of negativity might reveal you are burnt out.

Health Problems

When you’re burnt out, your body is physically depleted. Stress can leave you more susceptible to illnesses. Anxiety can create tightness in your chest and even arrhythmia. Depression can actually make your body ache. Mental health affects physical health.

In 2009, I had a nervous breakdown from being overloaded at work. That year, I used six months of sick time! I had precancerous cells, a tumor, a sinus infection that would never heal. Honestly, I felt like my body was breaking down (at the age of 29). I just couldn’t get well until I finally took a few months off work to rebound.

I’m not suggesting that being perpetually sick is solely due to stress. There can be lots of underlying health problems that can cause that. But if you find you are systematically unwell while also experiencing burn out, you may need to take a serious look at what stress is doing to your body. Remember, take care of yourself, friend.

8 signs you have mom burnout
Courtesy of Unsplash

You’re Not Motivated

You know this one well. Demotivation. When we are burnt out, the last thing we want to do…is…well…anything! We are tired of giving. Tired of sacrificing. You’re so done with picking up toys and wiping up crumbs! I know I’m burnt out when I let the house go, live in sweat pants, and have the TV babysit my kids. I know you’ve been there, mama. We all have! We all have days where we don’t feel like adulting, but if you have a long stretch of feeling like this it may be more than just feeling a little lazy. It may be the sign that it’s time for a change. Try switching up your routine or get outdoors. If you’re a stay-at-home mom, I’ve also found that inviting a friend over for the day can help battle the monotony and loneliness.

You Feel Overwhelmed

After I had my second son, I knew I was burnt out because I felt overwhelmed. For example, before my second son, I was a lively mom who loved hosting playdates and going to toddler “mommy and me” activities. But with my new addition, the thought of straying even down the street from my house overwhelmed me. I suddenly became a homebody because even a trip to the grocery store gave me anxiety. A big sign you are burnt out is the inability to handle small tasks without feeling overwhelmed. It’s a big cue you may have too much on your plate.

In moments like this, you need to ask for help. A neighbor, a spouse, parent, friend – someone you trust. Swallow some pride and ask someone to lend a hand or give you a break. Maybe you need to shirk some unnecessary things in your life to lighten your load. You may even need to get professional help, like a therapist to help process feelings of anxiety.

You Cry

I’m being candid here. I cry when I’m burnt out. Whether it is out of frustration or being completely overwhelmed, I find I fight back tears. First, there is no shame in crying. In fact, I recommend it. Crying is an emotional release. It is a biological mechanism designed to help us release pent up feelings that might otherwise burden us. Sometimes, having a good, hard, ugly cry is therapeutic. It is cleansing. Do yourself a favor. If you feel your eyes welling up, go to a private place. Scream into a pillow. Sob into your hands. Go ahead and open up to the heavens and have that deep, wailing, body-shuddering cry until you can’t cry anymore. Then get up and wash your face.

Hang In There, Mama

Listen, friend. Things might be rough right now, but they get better. We all get into slumps and have to struggle to find our way out. Get support. That includes seeking out professional help like a therapist if you need to. They can add tremendous value.

Thank you for reading, 8 Signs You Have Mom Burnout. Before you go, PIN this post for later and share it with a friend who needs it. Also, don’t forget to subscribe to my blog for future posts, FREEBIES and giveaways.

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Homeschooling, Parenting

100 Life Skills To Teach Your Child

by Mary Lentz1 Comment on 100 Life Skills To Teach Your Child

Your child doesn’t have to be unprepared for life. Equip them for adulthood. Here are 100 Life Skills to Teach Your Child.

100 life skills to teach your child

Many people are surprised when I tell them I went to live on my own in Europe at the age of seventeen. I don’t think there was anything particularly special about me. I just think my parents prepared me well for adulthood. At that age, I was well equipped to book a plane ticket and navigate a foreign airport. I made my way across another continent using bus and train schedules in multiple foreign languages – completely on my own. I’m not bragging – at least not about me. If any credit is due, it goes to my parents. Not only did they homeschool me, but they managed to teach me how to not need them.

My parents have never bought me a car. I’ve never borrowed money from them. I paid for college, my wedding and house without their help. If you’ve done a good job as a parent, your children won’t need a lot from you as adults.

Good parenting is working yourself out of a job

This isn’t a lecture for parents. It’s a reminder. It’s so much easier sometimes to just do things ourselves to get it done faster, but we do our “babies” a disservice. They lose out on life lessons. Today, I’m sharing 100 life skills to teach your children.

Include Them

As I wrote the list, I tried to think of all the things my parents taught me. I am one of three children, but I am the only girl. Our gender did not matter when it came to teaching life skills. My brothers were taught homemaking skills like cooking, ironing clothes, and how to properly clean. As a girl, I was taught how to change a tire, start a campfire, and basic survival skills. We all learned the same life skills.

The simplest way to to teach these skills is summed up in one word: inclusion. My mom loved to repaint rooms every so often. It was the cheapest way for her to redecorate. But one thing I remember is her including us. Instead of sitting us in front of a television to get us out of her way, she handed us a paint brush. She taught us how to open and store the paint and how to stir it. How to mask the trim and paint around corners. She taught us how to properly load the brush and rollers with paint. She’d show us how paint without streaks or splattering. I was able to fix up my first apartment thanks to the skills she showed me. “Everyone has four walls to work with. It’s what you do with them,” she used to say.

As a parent myself, I know tempting it is to brush the kids out of your way so you can get things done. But the best way to teach your children is by simply including them in your everyday activities. Paying for a check at a restaurant? Make them calculate a tip. Washing your car? Give them a sponge and put them to work. At the doctors office? Make your teen fill out their own forms.

Age Appropriateness

The list I provide, is for all age groups. Obviously there are things on the list that should be taught at an older age because of the dangers associated with them – like using a knife or learning to safely make a campfire. However, don’t underestimate introducing things at an early age. Introducing simply starts by talking and teaching your child why we do something a certain way.

Introducing also includes knowing they won’t likely master something until an older age. For example, when my son turned three, I started to include him on cleaning. I let him dry plastic dishes I’ve washed. I make him take his folded clothes upstairs to his room and make him scrub the toilet (I apply the chemicals and he swirls it around). Now four, he has chores every week. I know these things won’t be done perfectly. In fact, they may even create more work for me right now, but this instruction is about creating a habit in your child. It’s also about giving them responsibility, purpose, and sense of accomplishment. Young children especially love to help – so let them!

As a kid, when we went camping, my dad would first give us small unimportant tasks like bringing him the tent poles or gathering wood or kindling. As we grew older, so did our responsibility until finally we were capable of doing it entirely by ourselves.

100 Life Skills to Teach Your Child

  1. How to sew a button
  2. How to hem pants
  3. How to thread a needle
  4. How to use a sewing machine
  5. How to wash clothes
  6. How to bake a chicken
  7. How to cut up a whole chicken
  8. How to mow the grass
  9. How to file taxes
  10. How to balance a checkbook
  11. How to fill out a medical form
  12. How to buy a car
  13. How to bake a turkey
  14. How to stain a fence or deck
  15. How to wash a car
  16. How to change a tire
  17. How to check car fluids
  18. How to change a brake light
  19. How to get a state inspection sticker
  20. How to change a car windshield wiper blades
  21. How to repair a leaky faucet
  22. How to fix a running toilet
  23. How to organize a pantry
  24. How to crochet
  25. How to knit
  26. How to bake a cake from scatch
  27.  How to clean a toilet
  28.  How to descale a shower and shower head
  29. How to vacuum
  30. How to make a candle
  31. How to make soap
  32. How to start a fireplace fire
  33. How to build a campfire
  34. How to set up a tent
  35. How to fish
  36. How to swim
  37. How to change a baby’s diaper
  38. How to feed a baby
  39. How to bake bread
  40. How to use a fire extinguisher
  41. How to mail a letter
  42. How to play an instrument
  43. How to frame and hang a picture
  44. How to use a compass
  45. Basic etiquette
  46. How to use a drill
  47. How to clean a grill
  48. How to bake cookies
  49. How to preform the Heimlich maneuver
  50. How to perform CPR
  51. How to fold clothes
  52. How to iron clothes
  53. How to vacuum a swimming pool
  54. How to trim trees
  55. How to pull weeds
  56. How to mulch a flower bed
  57. How to paint a room
  58. How to save money
  59. How to calculate a sale price
  60. How to raise chickens
  61. How to navigate an airport
  62. Emergency preparedness
  63. How to mop a floor
  64. How to can food
  65. How to unclog a sink or toilet
  66. How to use a stand mixer
  67. How to chop vegetables / food
  68. How to check if food is ripe
  69. Basic first aid (dress a wound, apply pressure)
  70. How to read a map
  71. How to read a nutrition label
  72. How to pump gas
  73. How to write a resume
  74. How to apply for a job
  75. Critical thinking / logic
  76. How to set a budget
  77. How to BBQ food
  78. How to make basic meals
  79. How to check your credit score
  80. How to invest money
  81. How to calculate a tip
  82. How to write a thank you letter
  83. How to vote
  84. Basic politics and civics
  85. How to win and lose graciously
  86. How to apologize and ask for forgiveness
  87. How to set up electronics
  88. How to shampoo carpet
  89. How to use a camera (not a camera phone)
  90. Basic woodworking
  91. How to get to common places in your neighborhood
  92. How to polish furniture
  93. How to get a loan
  94. How to fix your credit
  95. How to filter water (survival skill)
  96. How to build a shelter
  97. How to meal plan
  98. How to shave properly
  99. How to pray
  100. How to carry on family traditions

I hope you’ve enjoyed this post, 100 Life Skills to Teach Your Child. Thanks for reading. Don’t forget to pin this post for later and subscribe to get FREE printables every month!

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Motherhood, Wellness

6 Things You’re Doing Wrong as a Mom

by Mary LentzLeave a Comment on 6 Things You’re Doing Wrong as a Mom

Gotcha! You’ve entered a judgement free zone. This isn’t about parenting styles or choices. It’s about how to be good to yourself in this tough season of life. Here are 6 things you’re doing wrong as a mom.

6 things you're doing wrong as a mom

I bet you saw this title and immediately thought I was about to judge you! I took a chance, knowing that the title of this post would turn people off right away. As you’ll see, that’s not what this post is about. This post is a loving reminder about being good to yourself. If there is anything we do wrong in motherhood it’s being overly harsh and critical with ourselves. We neglect ourselves far too often.

6 Things You’re Doing Wrong As a Mom

Neglecting Yourself

Y’all, I can be totally guilty of this. With all the things we have on our plates it’s so easy to put ourselves last. But you need balance in your life. You need a little fun, rest or relaxation. Sometimes just a couple of hours away is all you need. Mom burnout is a real thing. You can’t take care of your family well, if you’re depleted.

Taking care of yourself, needs to be as important as any doctor’s appointment or school function. It means planning ahead and scheduling time with yourself. I’ve already learned if I wait for it to happen it never will. It doesn’t matter how you spend that time. Maybe you take a long bubble bath or have a girl’s night with friends. Maybe it’s dinner and shopping trip alone or an evening at the gym. Just spend it doing something that recharges you and brings you joy. For ideas, take a look at my 30 Day Wellness Challenge.

Neglecting Your Marriage

Just as important as taking care of yourself is taking care of your marriage. We have a tendency to put kids first. That’s not a bad thing. But we have to remember to lovingly feed our marriage. If you don’t feed it, it will starve. I’ve always said that relationships are like bank accounts. When you are constantly making deposits, withdraws are easier to make. Withdraws are anything that subtracts from your marriage like occasional long hours at work or maybe some constructive “feedback.” Keep your marriage in the black. When you marriage is in the red it is strained and small withdraws can cause major upsets and fights. Hard times are easier to have when you are connected with your spouse.

This also includes making time for intimacy and sex. Yup…I’m going there. Sorry, me-maw! Girl, I know how hard it can be. You’ve been dealing with work and kids all day and the last thing you may want to do is “put out!” Haha! I know! Sometimes after a full day of being a human jungle gym the last thing I want is to be touched some more. But staying physically and emotionally close to your partner, really needs to take front and center stage. It gives your babies security and keeps your family strong. For ideas on small ways to connect, read my posts 25 Questions to Reconnect With Your Spouse and Easy Cheap Date Nights At Home

Failing to Share Responsibility

Look, I get it. I really do. Sometimes…well, most of the time, it is so much easier to just do things yourself. Rather than listening to grumbling, whining, and complaining from a husband and kids it’s just easier to be the martyr and get it done. If you have control issues, you may even feel the only way it will get done right is by tackling it on your own. (Confession: I struggle with that!)

However, two things happen when you do that. One, you shoulder the entire responsibility of household management which can lead to you having no time for yourself resulting in Mom Burnout. Secondly, your children miss out on developing vital life skills. I’m always amazed at how many women today can’t sew a button or cook something from scratch. It’s simply because they were never taught. I don’t mean that in a judgmental way, I’m simply trying to illustrate that we lose generational skills and traditions when we fail to teach our children. Keep in mind, if you don’t teach your child, they can’t teach their kids. In my next post, I’ll share 100 Life Skills To Teach Your Child. Giving your child consistent responsibility not only builds character, but it prepares them for life. Be a little selfish – delegate!

Not Having a Mom Tribe

Okay, full disclosure. As I write this, I don’t have a mom tribe. I had one for a long while and I can honestly say it was the happiest time of my mom life so far. Then I hit a rough patch. I was struggling personally and I didn’t feel the support I used to feel. Kids were getting older and some moms had moved on once kids were in school. Others had literally moved away. For many reasons I began to question if I had outgrown my group. I still occasionally go, but it doesn’t feel like home anymore. It’s been a year since I made the very hard to decision to take a break. I don’t consider it to be a mistake, but I also feel like this year was incredibly hard doing mom life on my own.

There was no one to talk to for advice or empathy. I miss laughing and going out with friends. This dry season has taught me just how important it is to have a mom tribe. It doesn’t matter if you work or stay at home. You need some women in your life who “get you.” These days, there are lots of ways to find them – work, church, school, Facebook groups, Meetup groups, MOPS, etc. It’s scary at first to make new friends and you’ll probably have to go a few times before you feel comfortable. You may even need to go to a few groups to find one you jive with. That’s okay. Just get out and make some friends in the same stage of life as you. Don’t worry. I’m starting to get out there too!

6 things you're doing wrong as a mom
Photo Courtesy of Unsplash

Trying to Be Perfect

If you read this blog regularly you’ll know, I’m a recovering perfectionist. Perfectionism can be really dangerous to your mental health. It’s also just a way to cover up insecurities. Goals are good and so is pushing yourself to do better. But some of us take it to an extreme and find ourselves crushed if we can’t meet our perceived standards.

The worse part about perfectionism is that it spills over to other people. We can begin to impose standards and expectations on family members and friends. It can turn into sanctimony and the judgement of others and nobody wants to feel judged.

Remember to be kind and merciful to yourself. Give yourself room for growth and learning by extending grace to yourself on a regular basis. It will be good for you and your relationships. It has taken me a long time to learn that people don’t identify with perfectionism. They identify with flaws.

Feeling Guilty

Okay, mama. This is a big one and I am guilty when it comes to this too. Mom guilt. It’s a real thing. It’s the sister of “trying to be perfect.” There are all kinds of things for which to feel guilty. Maybe you’re a working mom and you feel guilty that you don’t spend enough time with your kids. Maybe you feel guilty that you are overly harsh with your kids. Perhaps you feel guilty that you can’t keep up with your house or chores. The list is endless.

Guilt is a cognitive and emotional experience felt after a moral, personal, or universal standard isn’t met (accurate or not). Guilt is designed to be our moral compass to show us we’ve done something wrong. Shame and guilt are intended to be useful tools used to help convict us to do better. But something happens when it gets out of balance and it turns into excessive guilt. Feeling overly guilty can turn into self-condemnation and can lead our thoughts into very dark places. We may begin to feel unworthy of good things or happiness. It can lead to situational depression and unwarranted self-abuse. Remember, be compassionate with yourself.

Here are some steps to help:

  • Tell yourself you’ll do better next time
  • Remind yourself it was a learning experience and hindsight is always 20/20
  • Consider whether or not the situation was even within your control
  • Speak compassionately to yourself
  • Consider if your standards or ideals may be too high or rigorous
  • Remind yourself you are human and perfectionism isn’t possible

Before You Go

Thanks for reading 6 Things You’re Doing Wrong as a Mom. Don’t forget to PIN this post for later. Share it with a friend or on your Facebook wall. Also before you go, don’t forget to subscribe to my blog for FREEBIES and giveaways. I give them away every month.

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Appetizers, Recipes

Italian Cracker Snack Mix

by Mary LentzLeave a Comment on Italian Cracker Snack Mix

You’ve found a yummy, savory, super easy appetizer and snack. Try this three ingredient Italian Cracker Snack Mix.

Italian Cracker Snack Mix

Have I got one of the easiest recipes for you. Like so easy that there isn’t even any actual cooking involved. Can I get a Hallelujah?

I love this recipe because there are only three ingredients involved. I love to whip this up for a salty, savory snack. This is great for parties and get togethers. They’re great for guests to munch on while other food is coming. Additionally, I love making this and wrapping it up in cello bags for neighbors, teachers, and other people as a simple gift or in a gift basket with other goodies.

Making Italian Cracker Snack Mix

So as I mentioned, this is just three ingredients: olive oil, an italian season ing / dressing spice packet, and crackers. However, I do love to add a forth ingredient: crushed red pepper flakes. I like mine to have a little bit of spice, but that is totally up to you.

Italian Cracker Snack Mix

I’ve tried it with both regular saltines and mini ones and I have to tell you – the mini saltines win hands down. They are so good!

I’ve seen some versions call for a full cup of olive oil, but honestly I think it makes the crackers too greasy. I recommend starting with a half cup. You’ll gently stir and fold the crackers into the oil-spice mixture. The crackers should be fully coated. You can always add more oil if you feel its too dry. I recommend storing it in an air tight container overnight to let the spices fully meld. I find it is freshest in the air tight container for up to two weeks. By the way, you can also try this recipe with a Ranch seasoning packet.

Cracker mixture

Italian Cracker Snack Mix

Turn ordinary saltines into a yummy, savory, Italian spiced snack mix.
Print Recipe
Cook Time 5 minutes
Resting time 12 hours
Course Appetizer
Cuisine American

Ingredients
  

  • ½ Cup Extra Virgin Olive Oil
  • 1 Box Mini Saltine Crackers (11 oz)
  • 1 Packet Italian Dressing Seasoning (perferably Good Seasons)

Instructions
 

  • Add olive oil into a medium sized bowl.
  • Add spice packet and stir well into olive oil.
  • Pour entire box of crackers into the bowl and gently fold until all the oil is absorbed and crackers are completely coated.
  • If desired, add a sprinkle of crushed red pepper flakes.
Keyword 3 ingredient appetizer, appetizer, crackers, italian, saltimes, snack mix
Crackers
Crackers

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Don’t forget to see my other easy recipes like Parmesan Arugula Salad and Goat Cheese Fondue.

Marriage, Prayer & Spirituality

Decisions, Sacrifice, and Jobs

by Mary LentzLeave a Comment on Decisions, Sacrifice, and Jobs

Did you miss me? I took two weeks away from writing on this blog to catch up on some much needed rest. I’m guessing most of you didn’t even realize I was gone! That’s okay. I needed a break. If you’ve been following along, you know my husband recently left his job of seven years. They closed his field office here in San Antonio and we’ve been job hunting for eight months. Let me tell you, the process has been stressful.

There have been tears, prayers (e.g. begging and bargaining with God) and dashed hopes. There was several highly desirable jobs we wanted, but didn’t get. There were several jobs we were offered but the pay and circumstances were just plain deflating. I had naysayers and critics who thought we were fools for waiting (and for turning down perfectly good jobs). I had friends who were always reaching out and praying over us. I can’t express my gratitude enough for the support. It’s been an emotional rollercoaster!

We Finally Have a Job

We were really hoping to get a job with a local refinery here. We’ve tried every way to make that work, but they just weren’t fully sold on hiring my perfectly-qualified husband for the senior manger role he desired. Alas, we have an offer that gives us a huge pay bump. There is just one catch… it’s in Austin.

First, let me start off by saying that I am completely and deeply grateful for this opportunity. God has opened some huge doors here and he has blessed us exponentially in this situation. However, Austin was never on the map for us and we are shocked by the housing market there. Let’s just say, San Antonio is far more affordable. So much so, we are considering commuting from San Antonio instead of moving.

Moving

We love our house and we are so happy here with what we have. We are still early in our house search, but we’ve yet to find anything that is even remotely comparable for the price.

If we stay, as I anticipate we will, it will come with immense sacrifice. It will mean a ninety minute commute each way for my husband, but he’ll have every other Friday off. It means we can stay close to our family and don’t have to leave the church family we love dearly. It means we don’t have to uproot our children from their home.

My oldest son is so reliant upon routine and structure. It brings him so much security. He loves his room and his house. His memories are here. Our memories are here. We built this beautiful house ourselves. I love it so much, it would probably take something immensely better for me to consider giving it up. So far, I haven’t seen it – at least not without spending unGodly amounts of money.

We’re going to see how this works out. Thankfully, we don’t have to make a decision on moving immediately. We have some time to let this play out. if the commute becomes too big of a burden, we’ll seriously consider moving.

A Big Thank You

From the bottom of my heart, I want to thank everyone who has prayed over us in this hard season. There are some (you know who you are) that reached out every couple of weeks and let me cry on your shoulder. Others gave me hope when I was clean out of it! I won’t forget that. I know our actions confused a lot of people – especially when we said “no” to certain jobs, but thank the Lord we were never in a desperate position. We could afford to wait for the right opportunity and God has come through. It may not be exactly how we expected (it rarely is), but we’re certain God had a hand in all of it.

Plans For the Future

With Dan’s long commute, it means longer hours – and that equates to even longer days as a stay-at-home-mom. May I be honest? I’ve been struggling the last twelve months as a stay-at-home mom. I’ve felt lonely, bored, and disinterested. I wasn’t always like that. I was very happy for a long time because I was a part of a mom’s group. It felt like a big family. But I rarely participate in that group anymore. First, some friends have moved on as their children have grown. Secondly, the group has a very different vibe these days. Then a falling out with a “friend” left me feeling uncomfortable about returning and participating. I’ve tried out a few other different groups, but never felt chemistry. I’m very conflicted about where to go from here. I’m not sure where my place is or where God is guiding me. I do know that I need to find a my new mom tribe! I’m just not sure who or what that is.

Please continue to keep us in your prayers as we enter the new season God has for us.

Prayer & Spirituality, Uncategorized

Scripture Reading: Courage

by Mary LentzLeave a Comment on Scripture Reading: Courage

Courage is faith in action. We are called to step out in faith, regardless of opposition. Please join me for August Scripture Reading: Courage.

scripture reading courage
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Courage

I need courage. I’m terrified at failing at this blog. Deep down, I wonder if I’m tough enough to handle all the crazy curveballs parenthood throws. Did I ever mention that my marriage to Dan is actually my second marriage? Yup, my first marriage failed after he left me for another woman. I get sick to my stomach if I entertain the possibility of this one ever failing. Here is another big secret – I’m in the market for a new mom tribe, but too scared to actually go out and make friends. Right now, my husband is unemployed and I don’t work. God has promised us a job and we are trusting in Him to provide. I need courage.

Then there is the courage we need out in the world. Right now our culture is rapidly descending. Truth is being assaulted in every facet of society. The church has always been charged with proclaiming truth into the world and this moment is no different. Christians who understand Biblical truth are going to be persecuted here in the West. Christians will need the courage to stand up against “cancel culture.”

We all have things that we either too scared to set out and do or situations that leave us cowered in a corner. We need courage. Well, we’re blessed because Christ provides it. The bible is full of examples of courage.

Joshua & Caleb

One of my favorite stories about courage in the bible is about Joshua and Caleb, two of the twelve spies sent to scout the promise land. Here we find the people of Israel, they’ve been led out of Egypt and finally they found themselves at the threshold of their new home. The spies came back with a report and proof of plentifulness of the land. “We went to the land where you sent us. It truly flows with milk and honey, and this is the fruit.” There was just one catch. The current inhabitants were formidable and giant. “We were like grasshoppers in our own sight, and so were in their sight.”

That was all the people of Israel needed to hear. They immediately became despondent and began to whine and complain. After all they had suffered they were overwhelmed by the thought of having another obstacle in front of them. Even though God had promised to give them the land and victory, the Israelites began to rebel. Only Joshua and Caleb remained faithful – and God was watching.

No one will be able to stand against you all the days of your life. As I was with Moses, so I will be with you.; I will never leave you nor forsake you. Be strong and courageous, because you will lead these people to inherit the land I swore to their ancestors.

God ordered that all the non-believers over the age of twenty to remain in the wilderness. Those over twenty, along with Joshua and Caleb were permitted to enter. The disobedience of the Israelites cost them their promised land.

Choose Courage

I like to think of courage as the physical manifestation of faith. In other words, courage is faith in action. Throughout scripture God encourages us to “fear not” and ” be courageous.” He tells us “do not be discouraged.” Courage is how we obey those commands. Courage is not the absence of fear. It is feeling fear and doing it anyway.

It is important to understand that God never lies. God does not change (Malachi 3:6). Therefore, we can rest in His promises. I have learned in my Christian walk that courage and faith are daily choices. In other words, when fear starts to creep in and my mind begins to worry and dwell on negative outcomes, I must actively choose not to entertain it. I once heard a pastor say that worry is just negative meditation. Although our feelings of fear feel very real and overwhelming, we should remember that our feelings are not truth. The word of God is truth. This is why, when we are afraid it is so important to stay in the Word.

Fear focuses on ourselves. Courage focuses on Christ.

“When we can do nothing, Jesus can do all things.”

Charles Spurgeon
woman meditating in close up view
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Peter and John

After the death of Christ, the apostles continued performing miracles in the name of Jesus. John and Peter are subsequently arrested and brought before the Sanhedrin, the very council of holy men responsible for crucifying Christ. First they are interrogated. Then the Sanhedrin forbade them from healing in the name of Jesus Christ. In holy courage, Peter and John stand up against the council and stand in faith refusing to stop. The Sanhedrin, faced with the healed man and a growing crowd of support for Peter and John, agree to release the apostles. As a Christian, you can expect to be told to stay silent or reject the teachings of Christ.

Of all heroes in scripture, I find Paul the most inspiring. Paul faced numerous threats of imprisonment (Acts 20:23, 21:11) and death (Acts 20:3, 23:12-14) and refused to yield. In fact, Paul wrote about half the New Testament imprisoned, surrounded by a sewer. During his imprisonment he even dared to evangelize to his captors (Acts 23:1-10, 24:21-26, 26:32, 28:30-31). Regardless of circumstances, he reminds us we are “more than conquerors.” This kind of steadfast courage is not generated by the flesh, but rather manifested by the Holy Spirit.

Pray everyday for God to bless you with holy courage.

Courage & Conviction

Don’t think that persecution was only in the time of Christ. Christians today are facing immense opposition. The world (society at large) will always try to promote and normalize sin. Christians should not only remain obedient to God’s word but continue to speak truth into the world. However, this is both unwelcome and unpopular. Christians can expect to ridiculed, humiliated, ostracized, and mocked for our beliefs. In these moments, we will have to find holy courage to remain convicted. Jesus told us that most of the world is fleshly and on a path to destruction. Doing the right thing is a lonely road. Most of the world, won’t agree with you.

“Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life and only a few find it.” (Matthew 7:13-14)

When we endure humiliation or persecution for His sake, we should remember that we have the great reward of heaven. Earthly persecution is temporary.

Blessed are they who are persecuted for righteousness sake; for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

Matthew 5:10

How to Use This Scripture Reading

First, please do not take these scriptures out of context. Context means that you read only this verse and apply meaning to it. Rather, take a moment and start reading at the beginning of the chapter. Instead, you’ll focus on these verses, but within the context of the text. Here are some things to ask yourself when studying scripture:

  • Who wrote the text?
  • To whom is the writer speaking?
  • Who is involved in the verses?
  • What are the cultural and historical contexts?
  • Why did the author write the book?
  • What themes stand out?
  • When was this written?
  • What does this text say about God and His character?
  • What does the text say about man’s sin nature, character, or condition?
  • How does this fit into the big picture of scripture / the Bible? (Fall of man, salvation, sanctification)

Scripture Reading: Courage

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